October 13, 2009 at 11:10 pm (Blogroll, Health and Wellness, compassion, day to day, family, gossip, happiness, home, humor, life, mindfulness, pain, people, positive thinking, relationships, suffering, transition)
Tags: Becky, compassion, friends, happiness, Health, home, life, love, relationships
Still feeling the pain of my papi’s death, I find myself going through the motions of the day. I am still working on achieving tranquility and transcending through the pain. The sense of loss hurts so much, though I am learning to live with it.
I do not like being hurt. I do not like experiencing pain. I believe however that I become less of a human being if I learn the art of detachment. The price I pay for that sort of protection is too high. When I protect myself against the danger of loss, by death, by teaching myself not to care, not to let anyone get too close to me. I feel I lose a part of my soul. When I try to avoid pain, I let myself become less human, less alive. To be alive is to feel pain, and to hide from pain is to make yourself feel less alive.
I have found myself being less alive and depressed when I find myself avoiding the pain I have over the death of my papi. Yet when I face it, yet do not force it, I find myself being more aware, and more alive even if the pain at the time is more than I can handle.
Maybe my way is not the best way. What I have found is experiencing pain in its raw form has helped the healing process.
Peace and love to all who enter here
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October 7, 2009 at 11:12 pm (Blogroll, Health and Wellness, compassion, day to day, family, gossip, happiness, home, life, people, positive thinking, relationships, self image, self- esteem, simple living)
Tags: Becky, compassion, day to day, family, friends, happiness, Health, home, life, love, relationships
I was at the store today picking up a birthday card for my mom. I was not happy as there is road work going on outside my house, and it took forever to get out of my driveway. It had been dark and rainy most of the day, and so there I am at the store, when I just wanted to be home curled up with a good book. When all of a sudden I noticed them.
A young couple was standing in front of me. Both were in there early twenties. They had no frustrations, they were so wrapped up in each other. There arms were entwined, they were gazing into each other’s eyes, time itself might as well have stopped. I just smiled what else could I do ?
I remembered as I looked through the birthday cards, about 8 years ago a good friend was getting married. The night before her wedding she spent it in a traditional way with some friends and some cocktails. I remembered asking her “how do you know you are doing the right thing?” “How can you be sure?” And my friend who is older and already had a divorce under her belt, said “I just am”, and smiled.
A love story I feel is still the best story. Divorce numbers may rise and we may get hurt all in the struggle to give and get love, but we go on believing in the power of love as the purpose and meaning of our lives. Everyone has there own love stories. That is the reality of love.
As I was leaving the store I thought is that how I look when I am around the one I love. Does touching this person, kissing this person make me feel so good nothing else matters in that moment ?
Kiss me, touch me, hold me, love me….
To love and be loved is a wonderful thing.
peace and love to all who enter here….
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April 20, 2009 at 3:48 pm (Blogroll, alternatve family, day to day, family, gossip, home, life, photos, work)
Tags: day to day, dogs, family, friends, happiness, home, life, lucy, PICTURES, relationship, summer, time off, vacation, work
So this past weekend was busy I worked everyday. I am used to having three day weekends, it really wasn’t too bad. I just get tired, and my sleep gets a bit messed up but this Wednesday I have the day off and I plan on sleeping in and doing something fun. My mom and papi are in California visiting my sister Norma. They will be there for another two weeks. In the meantime I am keeping an eye on things at their house. Joel is also on vacation with his girlfriend and will be gone until the 7th of May. So Jenn and I are now covering for him at Ed’s. I don’t mind sucking it up and working weekends and covering at Ed’s because I know I will be taking a long well deserved vacation in August. I can’t wait.
Miss Lucy loves her merman toy.
Peace and love
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