I read a quote today that made me think about what is important in life.
“In the end nothing we do or say in this lifetime will matter as mcuh as the way we have loved one another.”
-Daphine Rose Kingma -

In the hussle and bustle of our busy days it is really easy to get caught up in the daily details and forget what is important in life. Often it takes some kind of trauma, the death if a loved one, an end to a relationship, or a life threatening illness to wake us up to what matters. Remembering what is important gives us the graciousness to take the time, make the phone call, send the card, or not say that bitter nasty comment to someone that we have on the tip of our tongue. When I have teken the time to remember what it is important, I have found I generate more loving kindness in my life. I take the time to smile at a stranger, to pass along a nice gesture or comment. It is really that simple.

Peace and love

“Since you get more joy out of giving joy to othes you should put a good deal of thought into the happiness that you are able to give.”
-Eleanor Roosevelt-

As we move through our lives we carry with us the accumulated experiences that mold our attitudes and our behavior. When we are young and inexperienced we are often more vulnerable to being pulled in different directions by the events of life. One bad experience in which our trust is betrayed, our generosity scorned or our love rejected can cause us to bulid unconscious defenses that have a unintended effect of isolating us. Of making us feel fearful and pull back from people and the world.

Later as we grow in maturity and wisdom, we learn that although we cannot choose what life will deliver to us we can choose how we will respond. We begin to live our lives more consiously, going back and sifting through the events that helped shape us. Examining why different emotions are triggered in our hearts. In doing all this I have taken control of my life, at a very raw and fundamental level. I have made a choice on how I want to live my life. I want to do what makes me happy. I want to make others happy. Love those that love me. Be understanding, and show kindness. In doing all this it has made all the difference.

Peace and love

Looking back at my life so far I have realized that at times I found myself between two worlds in an effort to meet what I feel are some basic human needs. The need to feel important and the need to think of myself as a good person. Someone who deserved the approval of other good people. I think we all have the need to know that we matter to the world, and that the world takes us seriously. I remember having all these thoughts and asking myself these questions when I would go and sit with my papi before he died. I remembered thinking what does he know that I do not. What I saw was a man that did not fear death. He felt that he had lived a long satisying life. I know too that he felt the pain of his sickness and I think he felt that only in death could he be released from his pain. I saw his will to live, but also saw that he was O.K. with his won impending death. I have seen at times the people that fear death the most are the people that feel that they never did anything worthwhile in their lives. Those people spend the last part of their lives wishing they had more time, and thinking in the “if only” frame of mind. My papi I feel knew he was leaving his mark in this world. He was not frightened or felt insignificant. It was hard to see all this yet it was one of the most beautiful acts I have ever seen the human spirit go through. I learned with all of this that while I still feel the need to know I matter, I have let go of expectaions. I live in the moment, and try to leave my mark not only in this worl but in those people that mean so much to me.

Peace and love